How to Get Donors to Talk About Money

When Charles W. Collier, a senior philanthropic adviser at Harvard University, talks with prospective donors,

he often gives them a copy of his book, Wealth in Families, as a way to help them think through plans for allocating their estates.

In the book, Mr. Collier argues that before wealthy people give their money to heirs or to charity, they should talk about the values that are most important to them and think about how a transfer of their money might influence their family members or help shape important causes in which they believe. He raises questions in his book, and in conversations with affluent Harvard alumni, to persuade people to think about topics such as how they can best teach their children about money, what effect an inheritance might have on their children and their children’s spouses, and what charities they would consider supporting.

Unlike many fund raisers, who spend much of their time trying to secure gifts for their institutions or provide tax advice to prospective donors, Mr. Collier often works with wealthy people to encourage them to get their children involved in family financial decisions and to persuade people to talk openly about money and the effect it has on their families. The conversations he has with people are often unrelated to Harvard and might never lead to gifts. But an increasing number of wealthy people are demanding the service Mr. Collier and many advisers offer, according to experts in financial-service companies.

To help other fund raisers have conversations like he has with donors, he advises asking wealthy donors a number of questions, many of which are in the book. Here is a selection:

• How did your parents handle money?
• What is your family’s definition of success?
• Should your family hold a meeting to talk about family history, family vision, and family money?
• How do you and your spouse differ on the treatment of money?
• How are you going to prepare your children for a financial inheritance?
• What will be the effect of this inheritance on your children and their marriages?
• When is it best to give children a financial inheritance?
• How much do you tell them and when?
• Should you give your children a say in their financial inheritance?
• What do you want the money to accomplish for your children?
• How is your family going to deal with prenuptial agreements?
• Do you feel any personal responsibilities beyond your family?
• What part does philanthropy play in your own value system?

Copies of Mr. Collier’s book, which was published by Harvard University and costs $15, are available from Katie Sawyer, Harvard University Office of Gift Planning, 124 Mount Auburn Street, Cambridge, Mass. 02138; (617) 495-5040; katie_sawyer@harvard.edu.