Seeking Gifts From Wealthy Donors: Tips From Philanthropy Advisers

Know the donor’s major interests. Richard Driehaus, a Chicago investor, likes to help organizations get started, says Sunny Fischer, who heads his foundation. “At first our role may be helping find other grants and giving advice and planning.”

Look at how the donor’s business may overlap with a charity’s mission. Christine Taylor, who advises the billionaire Ronald O. Perelman on his philanthropy, notes that her boss gives to women’s health research in part because he believes it helps the customers of one of his companies, Revlon.

Secure an introduction from someone the donor knows and trusts, suggests Ms. Taylor. That helps guarantee a better hearing for a charity request.

Propose ways to collaborate and share expenses. In tough economic times, a grant proposal will look good if it can underscore ways to reduce duplication of programs or administrative costs, says Margery Tabankin, who guides the philanthropy of Barbra Streisand, Steven Spielberg, and other wealthy donors. In short, Ms. Tabankin says, “show you’re not wasting money, and you’ll get money.”

Keep donors in the loop. Share both good and bad news about the program the donor has supported. “There is a power imbalance between the donor giving money and the one asking for it, but be real,” says Ms. Tabankin. “Don’t just tell us where things are working but when there are problems, too. In the long run, it will make us trust the information we are getting.” Such candor also helps cement a sense of partnership, she says.

Take “no” for an answer. Ms. Fischer dislikes it when charities insist on a meeting with Mr. Driehaus after she has turned them down at his request. As the head of his foundation, it’s her job to deliver the bad news. He probably knows the rejected grant request well and is unlikely to reverse the decision.

Don’t address requests for support generically. “A lot of people send out mass ‘To Whom It May Concern,’ or ‘Dear Sir’ letters. Don’t do that,” Ms. Taylor says. “If you can’t address a letter to Ronald by name or to me, then I don’t think you have given enough thought to what we do and what we are trying to do.”

Don’t copy others’ ideas. Ms. Tabankin reacts badly when someone pitches an idea as brand new that has already “been done in 17 cities.”

Don’t try to inflict guilt for turning down a proposal. “People will call and say something like: ‘How can you not be interested in these children?’” Ms. Fischer says. Others will argue that the foundation has once supported something quite similar to the rejected proposal. “Some just want to keep arguing,” she says.

Don’t be lazy about wooing donors. Some people will approach Ms. Fischer at a civic or charitable event and ask, “How do I build a relationship with you?” Her take: “Well, you do it by doing it, and usually over many years. You certainly don’t do it by attempting to put the burden of making it happen on the other person.”

Don’t take rejection personally. “If I don’t think we are going to be supporting somebody, I won’t take a meeting,” Ms. Taylor says. “I don’t want to waste anyone’s time.” Keep in mind that the next proposal might be a better fit for the donor’s support.